Compass

I was having a casual chat with a colleague over lunch one day, when he popped this question.

"Have you always been aware of what you want to do with your career since you started work?"

I paused a moment and for a few seconds, i debated in my head whether should the question be - do I actually know what I want to do in life? instead of the one he asked. Then, I acquiesced by pointing out that it was only about 5 years ago did I actually start convincing myself what i want to have in life, but not really about what to do in between that end point and then.

My point being is that I know now what i want to posses towards mid-life (50s please). It's actually 3 things or 3 basic states for that matter (nothing spectacular really!). One state is when my 2 kids have finished their chosen degrees from an Ivy League school and provided for them a comfortable headstart in making it on their own. Second being having expanded my existing retail businesses and successfully operating these. The third being, my wife and I possessing enough wealth to live our remaining lives comfortably in the suburbs of Manila near an owned-farm of fruit-bearing trees and being able to travel overseas for leisure every other month.

Image via Wikipedia

How am i going to get to that state is one thing that i am unsure.

I was reflecting and sharing with my colleague that in the years that I have worked, especially with that bank that i worked for the longest time, I never really had that burning desire about becoming the next CEO in X number of years or setting a target of how much money i should be getting in X number of months. It is not that i did not have any ambition for upward mobility then, but it was an assumption of mine that I will progress naturally if i do my job well. Whether I get to the next position or not is not a matter of objective, but a matter of consequence.

Well, i was of course wrong. Corporate life was not necessarily a bed of roses. As they said, sometimes the road to hell are paved with good intentions.

In this recent year, I have come to realize that i am increasingly becoming fixated with going back to the telecom industry that while it is not the end all and be all of the things that i want in life, it is for me a critical milestone in my journey between now and the end states i want to achieve in my life. Hence, for a particular job and position in this domain, it is now a matter of objective and deep desire.

How i have been planning to get there in the last 6 months has been a journey of disappointments and relief. So far, I have managed to stay the course in consulting, and have been able focus on what is needed and expected of me.

I don't know how long still until i am able to make the next step closer to what i want. In fact, the roads are right in front of me, while i wallow in convenient state of indecision.

As always, I am unsure on what road to take, consciously aware that the path i am thinking may not necessarily the only path towards my goal.

My Mom's Legacy

Here is a beautiful prose about lessons in life passed on by Leona Rubio Miranda, my grandmother, to her son, my uncle, Gilberto Miranda, who decided to share it with friends and loved ones.



My Mom’s Legacy
By Gil R. Miranda


To plants and animals including human beings, life has three directions— survival, reproduction and death. To survive, find a mate, reproduce seeds for plants, and raise a brood for animals and humans, and even in dying, one has to face countless difficulties. It is a dilemma. One needs to accept and understand that life is full of problems because problem itself is life and life is a problem. Life is meaningless without problems. Problems would not exist without life.

People earn their living because they solve other people’s problems. Lawyers find solutions to legal problems. Farmers resolve food problems. Engineers settle engineering problems. Teachers unravel education problems. One sorts out other people’s problems according to one’s forte or discipline.

As people earns from other people’s problems, they spend these earnings to solve their own. To survive, men need to provide themselves food, clothing, and shelter. Other than that, they provide their children with education, so that they may have a better chance of survival in the future. It is a continuing cycle of earning and spending hooked on a chain linked with problems.

Survival stirs up competition. The struggle makes man acquisitive. The phenomenon is rare to plants but is also common to a few species of mammals and insects. A few known species of plants and animals also hoard, but few become greedy. Human acquisitiveness turns to avarice, which complicates the problem all the more. That is why we seek social status, a place under the sun, recognition, and influence. These complicate our problems. We yearn for lavish foods, an extravagant house in a plush neighborhood, a more luxurious car and amass properties as much as we can. Yet, everyday, we mutter about problems. We mutter about the thorns that lay on the road going to our desired destination.

It is innate amongst living things to reproduce. Thus, looking for a perfect mate is an instinctual grapple. Living things has to show off their intrinsic good looks, strength, skills, intellect, etc. The point is not only to find the finest to help us disperse our inheritable factors, but to produce perfect children and assure that our genealogical seeds will survive a world only the fittest could endure. At times though, the process goes wayward. It boosts the human being’s own sense of self-importance. Some gifted persons, or those who believe they are, become conceited egotists. Consequently, the effort to solve a problem develops another. The adage probes itself, “There is always a solution to a problem as there always is a problem in every solution.”

Death to plants and animals may be unceremonious. Most humans however, wish to face this final act appropriately, marked with dignity and serenity. Some wish for immortality. People want other people to remember him. Eternal life may not be physically possible but somebody’s memory can live on. Life is a tussle, a brawl, but one has to strive to continue living on. We have to face an endless wave of problems to achieve another problem. When problems end, life ends.

Life is seemingly simple. Yet, once you dig deep into its labyrinth, it becomes more and more complicated. Someone who has gone through life earlier than us could give us roadmaps of the favorable route in the maze of life’s struggle. My mother left some. I thought I should share them with my children and anyone who may find it useful.

Keep your head down. — When you look up, you see things that are difficult to reach. Your attention focus on people with better paying jobs, elegant homes, nicer cars, etc. Look down and you will appreciate life more. You will be happier to know that your life is better than the others rather than having the worst.

If you love the things that you do, you never work at all. — A business executive would go fishing and enjoy it. For him it is a hobby. To a fisherman it is a job. If you will learn to treat your job a hobby, you will not work all your life.

Changing jobs, careers or business.— If you think you should quit your job, which you once wanted so much, got after scanning hundreds of want ad pages, grueling exams, and several exhausting interviews, do not change your job… change your attitude. (My mother always reminds me, “A rolling stone, gathers no moss.”)

Friendly relations — when you quarrel with a friend once, something must be wrong with your friend. When you quarrel with the same friend twice, think again, something must be wrong with either you or your friend. When you quarrel with the same friend for the third time…something is wrong with you.

Life has no pause, stop, or rewind buttons. It does not have a fast forward button either— Life runs incessantly. It is unstoppable. It is not the problems of today that drive men mad. It is the regrets of yesterday, which one cannot redirect, and the fear of the future, which one cannot preview. Except for the lessons that the past brings, forget every yesterdays. Leave all despair on the way and travel towards each tomorrow with fresh hopes.

Most of your worries do not happen. — Many people shake away opportunities and fail to achieve lifetime dreams because of worries that do not always happen. Brave men who ignore obstacles succeed. Coward people who worry does not dare— they fail. Remember that fear is only imaginary.

Most people want to help. They are only waiting for you to ask for it. — Sometimes, we need help, but we do not ask, because we fear rejection. Most people are gracious and compassionate. They just do not offer their assistance because they fear rejection too.

Be generous with praises. — Everyone welcomes words of admiration. Praise is a necessary tool in a polite society. One who generously uses it gains more friends. Like a rider’s whip, its use is necessary to make a horse run faster.

Dreams do not stay in one place— Dreams are mobile. It moves as fast as you reach for it. Dreams are illusions. Like a rainbow, it either changes its position or runs away as you get near it.

When in panic, press the button. — When something goes wrong in the bathroom, you call a plumber. When something is wrong with your car, you see a mechanic. When you are in pain, you visit your doctor. When everything seems to be wrong call God, He is only a prayer away from you.

Day 3 of Amazing Busuanga

We started the day early. At 630am we scaled the 700 plus steps to Mt. Tapyas (Tapyas literally means carved - so its called the Carved Mountain). The view is breathtaking! Mt. Tapyas has a giant lighted Cross on its peak, serving both as beacon for boatmen at night time as well as one of major tourist destinations of the municipality. It was a big pain scaling those 700 plus steps! I tried counting but i lost count trying to catch my breath. At the top, Mt.Tapyas offers an awe-inspiring panoramic 180 degree view of the Busuanga islands. The scenic nature view is so fantastic that you would want to make a realist mural painting of it and put it up in some lobby of a hotel.

After a 15 minute break at the top panting for air and forcing smiles for memoir photos of Busuanga in between breaths, we went down the 700 steps thankful to a vendor who was selling bottled water at the 350th step. I guess he knows when the real thirst kicks in for tourists who scale Mt.Tapyas.

Upon reaching Coron Village Lodge, Dexter, our tour guide has packed our breakfast meals and raring to go. Finally, we are going to Malcapuya Island.

It was a 1.5 hours boat ride and this time we used a bigger motorboat so we can move swifter across the hypnotic waves of the Palawan seas. It was a fun ride, and Malcapuya is one of the farther islands from the Coron town proper and it is really an effort to reach it.

Dexter did not disappoint us. Malcapuya is truly an awesome island! Fine white sands! Well not truly close to the Boracay white and fine sands, but the place in its pristine state provides a most appealing factor.

What was more amazing is the Giant Clam show treat underwater. Just a few meters away from the shore, you can snorkel and experience an upclose visual treat of live Giant Clams.

The tour guide was explaining that the Giant Clams are protected by the local authorities because they are decades old and will be worth more money as a tourist attraction than for eating :-). Indeed, he was right, the Giant Clams were very nice to look at and my wife and I can literally stay afloat for minutes in snorkels gawking at them intermittently moving like giants' mouths.

Towards the afternoon, my wife and I walked around the beach area and we saw uniquely formed sand and rock formations. They were very nice, and at that instant you wonder how they even got formed that way.

Both were amazing creations, but while the first is quickly created and destroyed by the daily high and low water ebbing tides, the latter took few scores to form into its unique forms.

As we left, Malcapuya Island I knew in my heart that i will not probably see the place in a long time, hoping that somehow when and if I do again and when the kids have grown up, Malcapuya, and the entirety of the Busuanga Islands remain as pristine as it is yet today.

We celebrated our new discoveries that night as my wife, my sisters-in-law, Aileen and Au, who happens to celebrate her birthday that day (June 3) as well, and my brother-in-law Gerry, gather around with San Mig Light to quench our thirst...thankful as well that Mama insisted that we take the time out as a family as her birthday gift, else we would not have seen a beautiful place like Busuanga (http://wikitravel.org/en/Busuanga).

A few more days, it will be back to reality...

Day 2 of Amazing Busuanga

Day 2 was a sluggish one. We woke up early at around 530am, but had to wait for the breakfast to be served at 730am as the Lodge's employees only come to work at 7am. We were supposed to leave early for Malcapuya Island, a beach area famous for its protected clams for snorkeling adventure and long stretch of white sand beach front.

Rather than sulk, i just read mails from office :-).

So finally, we were able to leave by 830am for Malcapuya Island. But it was not meant to be, before we reach halfway of our destination, the waves indicated that it will not take an hour of motorboat trip instead some 2 plus hours. Buds and Reynante, our nice Cuyonen boatmen, advised that it might not be safe to proceed with the size of their motorboat.

So we turned back and headed for the Banol Beach. It was a blessing in disguise. Banol Beach is a nice and easy place to swim and have fun with the kids, while having some private lunch of nicely cooked Cusido (a type of delicacy - can't remember the kind of fish - cooked in calamansi,string beans and lady finger) and grilled pork chop, and having ripe Mangos for desserts.

After lunch, we went back to Twin Lagoon, this time it's low tide. We went to the other side through the underwater cave and this time, no cuts from the jagged walls given the water level allowed a comfortable swim towards the other side of the Lagoon. This lagoon is quite popular, Dexter, our Cuyonen guide, said. It's almost a standard destination with every batch of tourist going to Coron. True enough, we found ourselves with some 20 other tourists who were already on the other side, gleefully romping in the deep waters of the enclosed lagoon. We stayed for a while and enjoy the scenery around the enclosed lagoon. An hour after, we headed for the Siete Pecados - a preserved marine park famous for snorkeling of scenic corals.

Siete Pecados - This marine park is an extravagant show of multi-colored and multi-shaped live corals. I managed to take pictures of the awesome corals with my sister-in-law's underwater digital camera, and you will be floored by the beauty of these underwater sea creatures exude. First time in my life that i ever got close to almost touching distance to these creatures, which i have only seen in shows like Discovery Channel and National Geographic. I tell you it is one of those experiences I will never forget.

Day 1 of Amazing Busuanga

We landed at the Busuanga airport at around 11am of June 1, with the weather threatening to get worse. After 15 minutes of hovering in the air, the pilot managed to land the plane at the airport, to the relief of some 50 people who were just too excited to taste the raw beauty of Busuanga islands.

After we landed, a transport service from the Coron Village Lodge brought us at the hotel for a sumptous lunch at the hotel's simple yet appropriately set up bamboo-motiffed restaurant. We were given about an hour by the tour guide, Dexter, to unpack and get ready to see the virgin locations that the people of Busuanga, the Cuyonens, are all too proud about.

We ride a motorboat at around 230pm. Two nice Cuyonens - Buds and Reynante have been tasked to ferry us around Busuanga in the next 3 days. Cuyonens, as i have observed, are sincerely nice and really proud when showing off the beauty their home has to offer. Rightfully so, I agree.

It is such a joy to see a pristine place like Busuanga. Day 1 in Coron (town or municipality located in the Busuanga Islands in Palawan province in the Philippines) is such a blast that I can't find the right expressions of awe evoked by the virgin locations we have been to, just in Day 1.

Our first destination was the Atuwayan beach and the snorkeling was liberating. Then, we went on to see the Twin Lagoon and for the first time, I have seen and experienced diving in an underwater cave bounded by razor sharped stone walls that gave me nasty cuts in some of my fingers just by touching them.

Afterwards, we went to the very serene Cayangan Lake, supposed to be a sacred lake maintained by the local Tagbanua tribe - a more than 1000-year and still existing indigenous tribe that preceded even the waves of Aetas, Malays, and Indonesian immigrants to the archipelago. Only that getting there requires scaling some 200 hundred step mountain footpath that goes up and down, requiring me and my brother-in-law to carry my son Cobi, half of the way. My legs nearly buckled down more than once, both from Cobi's weight and mud-slippery steps.

Cayangan Lake is such a clean lake that you can see the bottom at 14 meters deep. The water is amazingly clear. Dexter, the tour guide said it has been officially acclaimed as one of the world's 'cleanest lakes' in the last 3 years, having been consistently proven by biologists for its cleanliness comparable with similar places across the world. I have to believed it when i actually swam in it. Awesome lake indeed!

We capped the day by going to another amazing place - a seawater hot spring, the Makinit Hot Spring. Wow, it was such a joy to dip in it and soothe your aching muscles after having been flexed pre-maturely swimming and diving a few hours ago.

We headed back to the Coron Village Lodge at around 7pm, and after another sumptous dinner of tasty crabs and beef soup, we retired to bed. Of course, I had to see some 100 emails from the office that made me guilty for a moment. But after realizing how much i would have missed if i did not go with the family to this holiday, I would not exchange this experience for anything my colleagues in Singapore can offer :-). I knew deep in my heart that my wife and kids are proud i made the right choice on this one.

Got to go now, breakfast is waiting. I don't like the Longaniza (grounded meat made into sausage - a Filipino breakfast delicacy) and the Danggit (a dried small fish, which is best eaten fried with fried rice during breakfast) getting cold on me....

It's Day 2 of my Busuanga holiday!